Saturday, May 12, 2007

It seems we're rounding the corner in the battle of the virus. 2 of the kids are now at least moderately healthy and one is on the up swing! Yay!

I am struggling with knowing when is too much. I am involved in so many things and really enjoy them all but I'm not so sure that I have the time for them. I know that if God is calling me to them that the time will happen, but discerning whether or not it's God calling is another issue. I know that I struggle with pride. A lot. It's so nice to know you're wanted. I am always afraid that I am doing something so I can feel "important", selfish things. How do I know that it's God's calling and not my need for attention? Am I the only one struggling with that kind of thing or is this something that most Christian's fight with?

I am looking into a local Carmelite Convent, I just recently learned that they have a lay order!! I am so excited, I really really really want to be a part of that, as I just talked about doing too much! I have always had such a pull to the Carmelites. I have always loved them. Probably in the romantic notion of being hidden away spending your life in prayer and work. Real work. But even now it seems to appealing. I know I need some help with my prayer life. Badly. I'm hoping this will edge that along. I've heard that the commitment isn't a small one. That's a little scary but I have the support of my husband so I am going to look into it. I don't even know what it entails, so we'll see.

Happy Mother's Day!